Update

The past ten years have been tough. They have been full of uncertainty, grief, and frustration. I have been tested physically, mentally, and emotionally. My body has gone through hell and back. But I’m still standing. My stubbornness is something I joke about often, like it’s a flaw of mine. But to be honest, I probably would have given up by now if it wasn’t for that stubbornness.

A little more detail to my previous post: in November of last year, I was sent for a HSG (hysteriasalpingogram), because the new specialist I was seeing believed the reason I wasn’t ovulating was because I had a blocked fallopian tube. This was extremely painful and I could see the confusion on the specialist and radiologist’s face while they were looking at the screen. Finally the specialist spoke. “Your fallopian tube isn’t blocked… It’s not there at all.”

It turns out I was only born with a rare condition called Unicornuate (Unicorn) Uterus, which is half a reproductive system (one ovary, one fallopian tube and only 50% of my uterus). I was also diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome), which explains why I don’t ovulate and why my menstrual cycle is irregular. I also have a weak and scarred cervix from issues and surgeries I had at the beginning of my infertility journey.

So, in basic terms, I don’t ovulate, which means I can’t get pregnant. If by some miracle I were to get pregnant, my reproductive system is too small and too weak to carry a baby full-term. The chances of miscarriage is extremely high, as is the chance of as an ectopic or tubal pregnancy (where the baby begins developing in my fallopian tube instead of my uterus), which can cause life-threatening internal bleeding.

As someone who has wanted to be a mom my entire life, this is extremely heartbreaking. It is also frustrating that I had no idea I was born with a Unicorn Uterus. Through ten years of testing, procedures and treatments I underwent for my previous issues, how had the doctors not thought to check to see if I even had my whole reproductive system?

With this condition, it is common to also have been born with only one kidney, and other organs may be missing or smaller than usual. After our last specialist appointment a few months ago, a referral was sent to get an ultrasound and MRI. Because the condition is so rare (1 in 4000 women), not much research has been conducted, so getting answers has been extremely challenging. Add the complications associated with PCOS and I’m quite the anomaly.

We had planned on starting IVF this year, but that was when we thought getting pregnant was our only issue. Since staying pregnant is now the bigger problem, our best (only) option is to use a surrogate via IVF once we find out if the eggs in my one ovary are viable, or if stimulated ovulation is possible. We have been waiting for almost four months now and have still not gotten a call to schedule the ultrasound or MRI.

Today, for the first time in three years, we got some good news. The specialist said my ultrasound is scheduled for next month, and I am starting Letrozole treatment which will hopefully help me ovulate. I have been using OPKs for about two years now and have not found surges in my LH levels, so if this works it would be HUGE. It would mean there is hope for our plan to use a surrogate to become parents. It would mean there is still a chance, and no matter how small, we’re holding onto it!